I've used this line before to get kids excited for a story. You guys want to hear about times when I turned invisible? It works pretty well.
I've said in previous blog posts that I think animals are drawn to meditating humans. However I think that when that has happened to me I wasn't really meditating because I was paying attention to everything. I think when people meditate what they are really doing is tuning everything out. I like to sit in the woods and tune in.
Here are three examples of times I "turned invisible".
The first happened when I was living in Colorado. I was sitting on the intramural sports field at CSU watching the moon rise. It was a huge beautiful yellow moon coming up on the horizon. It was pretty late, probably 11 or 12 at night. As I sat there taking in the colors of the moon and the sounds of the night and feeling the wet grass on my legs I saw something bobbing out of my peripheral vision. I realized something was coming towards me but I didn't want to look over. I sat there watching the bobbing get bigger until it was right in front of me. A long legged, scrawny red fox. It came right up to my outstretched feet and started sniffing them. I sat there watching. It felt like meeting a celebrity or something. To have a truly wild animal right there sniffing my feet was awesome. After a few good sniffs it had enough and continued on its way. I watched it trot off and went back to my moonrise, totally blown away by what just happened.
One morning in New York state I went for a walk. It was early summer and the grass was all covered in dew. Up ahead on the trail I saw two baby bunnies playing. I stood very still, relaxed myself, opened up my peripheral vision and all of my senses and just waited. I knew from experience that animals are just drawn to this kind of energy. Ten or fifteen minutes later the bunnies were at my feet licking my toes and chewing on my sandals. Eventually they must have picked up my scent cause they took off in a flash all of the sudden.
Another afternoon in New Hampshire I was sitting in the backyard flint knapping. I thought this experience was interesting because I wasn't being still or quiet at all. I was banging rocks together. However my energy was the same. I had no thoughts in my head. I was totally absorbed in a peaceful state of trying to make something beautiful when I heard fluttering and felt something on my head. I waiting, wondering if that really just happened when a little tufted titmouse flew off my head, down to my feet and started hopping around.
All of these experiences are very special to me but I don't think that I'm special because I get to have them. Nature opens up to anyone willing to be patient and pay attention and no matter how long you have to wait, its always more than worth it.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Bear trailing
This is another story that I feel was a spiritual experience.
I was tracking behind my house in New Hampshire a couple months ago at the sand pit I would go to nearly every day. In all of the times I had gone there I had never seen bear tracks or heard of bears being in the area. On this particular day I decided to go check out a road that bordered the sand pit that I had never been to. On the road I found fox tracks and as I bent down to see if they were from a red or gray fox I noticed right next to them a faint but clear line of toes and a big heel pad. It was a fresh track of a small black bear. I felt a buzz in my body which I have felt many times before when I was about to have a spiritual experience. I took out my camera to get a picture of the tracks. Being in the sand pit all the time takes a toll on my camera and often when I turn it on it will read "lense error" and turn itself off. That was the case this time so as I searched up and down the road for more tracks I repeatedly turned my camera on and off over and over again praying that it would work and I would have proof that there really was a black bear in our backyard.
Miraculously the bear left no other tracks besides two or three clear ones in a line. The road was surrounded by sand which I searched with painful scrutiny for tracks but I couldn't find anything. There were deer tracks, turkey tracks, fox tracks but no bear. I slowly became obsessed with finding and following the trail of this bear so I started combing larger circles around the original set of tracks on the road. Hours passed and my circles grew to be miles. I was tracking the entire landscape in my head thinking of the most likely route for the bear to follow. I found a river that would definitely funnel the bear one way and I gained more inspiration. I found many other exciting things like the kill site where coyotes took down a deer and the feather of a red-shouldered hawk. I had never found a hawk feather before so that was really cool for me.
Eventually it started to get dark and I reached the end of the sand pit two or three miles from the road where the tracks were. My camera still refused to turn on and I finally admitted defeat. I took the lesson from this experience to be that even huge things are going on right under my nose that I don't know about. Big animals can sneak by without me ever knowing because I wouldn't even have seen those tracks if I wasn't bent over looking at fox tracks on a road that I never go to. As I turned to make the long walk back to my car I looked down and saw them. A long string of beautiful clear tracks from my bear. I had walked right over these tracks a few minutes before without seeing them. It was almost dark now but deep down I knew that if I gave it one more try, my camera would turn on. And it did- just long enough for one picture before going back to the lense error.
I was tracking behind my house in New Hampshire a couple months ago at the sand pit I would go to nearly every day. In all of the times I had gone there I had never seen bear tracks or heard of bears being in the area. On this particular day I decided to go check out a road that bordered the sand pit that I had never been to. On the road I found fox tracks and as I bent down to see if they were from a red or gray fox I noticed right next to them a faint but clear line of toes and a big heel pad. It was a fresh track of a small black bear. I felt a buzz in my body which I have felt many times before when I was about to have a spiritual experience. I took out my camera to get a picture of the tracks. Being in the sand pit all the time takes a toll on my camera and often when I turn it on it will read "lense error" and turn itself off. That was the case this time so as I searched up and down the road for more tracks I repeatedly turned my camera on and off over and over again praying that it would work and I would have proof that there really was a black bear in our backyard.
Miraculously the bear left no other tracks besides two or three clear ones in a line. The road was surrounded by sand which I searched with painful scrutiny for tracks but I couldn't find anything. There were deer tracks, turkey tracks, fox tracks but no bear. I slowly became obsessed with finding and following the trail of this bear so I started combing larger circles around the original set of tracks on the road. Hours passed and my circles grew to be miles. I was tracking the entire landscape in my head thinking of the most likely route for the bear to follow. I found a river that would definitely funnel the bear one way and I gained more inspiration. I found many other exciting things like the kill site where coyotes took down a deer and the feather of a red-shouldered hawk. I had never found a hawk feather before so that was really cool for me.
Eventually it started to get dark and I reached the end of the sand pit two or three miles from the road where the tracks were. My camera still refused to turn on and I finally admitted defeat. I took the lesson from this experience to be that even huge things are going on right under my nose that I don't know about. Big animals can sneak by without me ever knowing because I wouldn't even have seen those tracks if I wasn't bent over looking at fox tracks on a road that I never go to. As I turned to make the long walk back to my car I looked down and saw them. A long string of beautiful clear tracks from my bear. I had walked right over these tracks a few minutes before without seeing them. It was almost dark now but deep down I knew that if I gave it one more try, my camera would turn on. And it did- just long enough for one picture before going back to the lense error.
My first fire
When I was first learning how to make a bow drill fire it was a long and painful process. I would practice in the backyard but I would always hit a dead end and give up frustrated. I practiced nearly every day for a long time and I would learn a little more about how to make it work better each time I failed. A year went by and I felt pretty confident with bow drill despite the fact that I had never gotten a fire.
One day, after another frustrating practice session I went inside and saw a blog post about a guy who wanted to learn how to make a fire with bow drill. I read his blog and saw his pictures and criticized everything he was doing. His drill was way to skinny and his form was terrible. It was obvious that he had no idea how to do bow drill. However, after three days of practice he was able to get a fire.
I was pretty torn up about the whole thing. I had been trying for a year and I probably did know more about bow drill than this guy and yet he could get a fire and I couldn't. I left the computer and drove over to my friend's house. As I was driving and thinking about this whole thing I really got upset at myself for being so critical of this guy and then this word hit me: Arrogance. Immediately chills ran down my spine and I knew that if I went back home right then I would be able to make a fire. I didn't know why but I knew something had changed in me and that I could do it now.
The entire evening hanging out with my friends I was distracted and couldn't wait to go home and see if this was true. When I got home around 1am I went upstairs to the third floor where I would sit and practice hand drill (hand drill is more difficult than bow drill - generally people learn hand drill after they have gotten a fire with bow drill). I could practice on the third floor because there had never been any risk of me actually getting a fire. I rarely ever made smoke for that matter. Well I sat down to practice and I got a coal, blew it into fire and had to throw it out the window. I was overwhelmed with adrenaline and amazement that it actually happened. The next morning I went outside and got a bow drill fire on my first try.
This experience could be easily written off as coincidence or some little psychological thing. But to me it was magical. It felt like I was given a gift from a different world. And also a story that I can share with people as they are struggling to get their first fire.
One day, after another frustrating practice session I went inside and saw a blog post about a guy who wanted to learn how to make a fire with bow drill. I read his blog and saw his pictures and criticized everything he was doing. His drill was way to skinny and his form was terrible. It was obvious that he had no idea how to do bow drill. However, after three days of practice he was able to get a fire.
I was pretty torn up about the whole thing. I had been trying for a year and I probably did know more about bow drill than this guy and yet he could get a fire and I couldn't. I left the computer and drove over to my friend's house. As I was driving and thinking about this whole thing I really got upset at myself for being so critical of this guy and then this word hit me: Arrogance. Immediately chills ran down my spine and I knew that if I went back home right then I would be able to make a fire. I didn't know why but I knew something had changed in me and that I could do it now.
The entire evening hanging out with my friends I was distracted and couldn't wait to go home and see if this was true. When I got home around 1am I went upstairs to the third floor where I would sit and practice hand drill (hand drill is more difficult than bow drill - generally people learn hand drill after they have gotten a fire with bow drill). I could practice on the third floor because there had never been any risk of me actually getting a fire. I rarely ever made smoke for that matter. Well I sat down to practice and I got a coal, blew it into fire and had to throw it out the window. I was overwhelmed with adrenaline and amazement that it actually happened. The next morning I went outside and got a bow drill fire on my first try.
This experience could be easily written off as coincidence or some little psychological thing. But to me it was magical. It felt like I was given a gift from a different world. And also a story that I can share with people as they are struggling to get their first fire.
Ropes to God: the bushman spiritual universe
I've been reading a book about Bushman spirituality and it has reminded me of my own spiritual life which I don't think should be something that I keep to myself. Even if its misunderstood or dismissed I think my own experiences were given to me with the agreement that I would pass them on to other people. So I'm going to make an attempt to share more of my "spiritual" beliefs and experiences.
Whenever I read about indigenous spirituality I see trends and similarities to stories from other native people and also nature connected people. For instance in this Bushman book they talk about the trance dances and that when they are a strong dancer they start to see lines of different colors that connect things. One of the lines connect them to the animals and they run all over the ground to different animals and when they need meat the "Big God" shows them a line to an animal and they follow it to hunt. I've heard trackers in North America talk about these lines that they follow and the feeling of being pulled along a trail of an animal even when they can't see any tracks.
There is something about all of the primitive skills that makes me feel very spiritual. The reason that I do them isn't because its fun or because I want to be an indian. It is because they make me feel like I'm growing closer to God. I don't know why they do this and it doesn't really matter to me why it makes me feel that way but it does. And all of those feelings kind of get stuck if I'm not passing on what I learn to other people. That's something the Bushmen talked about too.
My next several posts will be about some of my "spiritual" experiences. I put quotes on spiritual because I don't want my experiences to be lumped in with some other definition of spirituality. To me they are just things that happened that seem to be connected to things greater than what goes on in every day life.
Whenever I read about indigenous spirituality I see trends and similarities to stories from other native people and also nature connected people. For instance in this Bushman book they talk about the trance dances and that when they are a strong dancer they start to see lines of different colors that connect things. One of the lines connect them to the animals and they run all over the ground to different animals and when they need meat the "Big God" shows them a line to an animal and they follow it to hunt. I've heard trackers in North America talk about these lines that they follow and the feeling of being pulled along a trail of an animal even when they can't see any tracks.
There is something about all of the primitive skills that makes me feel very spiritual. The reason that I do them isn't because its fun or because I want to be an indian. It is because they make me feel like I'm growing closer to God. I don't know why they do this and it doesn't really matter to me why it makes me feel that way but it does. And all of those feelings kind of get stuck if I'm not passing on what I learn to other people. That's something the Bushmen talked about too.
My next several posts will be about some of my "spiritual" experiences. I put quotes on spiritual because I don't want my experiences to be lumped in with some other definition of spirituality. To me they are just things that happened that seem to be connected to things greater than what goes on in every day life.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Nature defined
I think humans are strange in many ways. One of the strangest things to me has to be the fact that humans (an animal on Earth) one day forgot that they were an animal on Earth. They seem to think that they stopped being like the plants and animals and rocks and became something totally different. I think it is a result of being able to make such neat things. If a bird makes a nest, the nest still looks like mud and grass which is obviously nature. But cell phones and planes don't look at all like nature. The truth is that they are natural. They are just things that an animal made. Of course an airplane doesn't biodegrade like a bird's nest does but there are lots of natural things that mess up an ecosystem if its in the wrong place.
There are some natural laws that humans ignore. But the laws are still there and these are the things that I'm most interested in tracking. Economics for example has been around long before humans. Feathers on a bird are a huge energy investment that pays off through flight. Just like the way we pay lots of money to fly places, as long as its worth it. Animals get fat just like we do if they have the same food surplus and sedentary lifestyle.
Another natural law is evolution. Evolution creates perfection. Or as close to it as possible. Once something stops evolving then its practically perfect. The bicycle for example. Its not going anywhere. Its a super efficient, fun way to travel. The evolution of computers is really cool and the evolution of our culture is very interesting to me. Its when things are restrained from evolving that I see problems occur. Religion, politics, and education come to mind. They all evolve eventually but it feels like they are treading in molasses sometimes.
All of the pure truths of the world can be found by tracking nature. This is a very comforting thing for me because society is a confusing place sometimes.
There are some natural laws that humans ignore. But the laws are still there and these are the things that I'm most interested in tracking. Economics for example has been around long before humans. Feathers on a bird are a huge energy investment that pays off through flight. Just like the way we pay lots of money to fly places, as long as its worth it. Animals get fat just like we do if they have the same food surplus and sedentary lifestyle.
Another natural law is evolution. Evolution creates perfection. Or as close to it as possible. Once something stops evolving then its practically perfect. The bicycle for example. Its not going anywhere. Its a super efficient, fun way to travel. The evolution of computers is really cool and the evolution of our culture is very interesting to me. Its when things are restrained from evolving that I see problems occur. Religion, politics, and education come to mind. They all evolve eventually but it feels like they are treading in molasses sometimes.
All of the pure truths of the world can be found by tracking nature. This is a very comforting thing for me because society is a confusing place sometimes.
Tracking defined
I'm always trying to define just what exactly a tracker is. My best current definition is this:
A Tracker is someone who searches for the origins of things.
Tracking definitely isn't about footprints because I spend plenty of days tracking without seeing footprints. I see feeding sign, scat, trails, beds, etc. And often I'm tracking things that aren't animals. Like seeing lines made from grass or leaves blowing in the wind.
I think tracking is a essential part of being a human being and I think that the happiest people are the ones that track the most. They seem more engaged, curious and satisfied with life. Doctors track their patients, comedians track their audiences, authors track whatever they are writing about, coaches and athletes track everything about their game and so on. I think its important for people to track themselves too. I know I'm always searching for the origins of why I feel a certain way or why something is hard or easy for me. One pattern I definitely see in myself is that I'm happiest when I'm tracking nature. But I have a pretty broad definition of nature.
A Tracker is someone who searches for the origins of things.
Tracking definitely isn't about footprints because I spend plenty of days tracking without seeing footprints. I see feeding sign, scat, trails, beds, etc. And often I'm tracking things that aren't animals. Like seeing lines made from grass or leaves blowing in the wind.
I think tracking is a essential part of being a human being and I think that the happiest people are the ones that track the most. They seem more engaged, curious and satisfied with life. Doctors track their patients, comedians track their audiences, authors track whatever they are writing about, coaches and athletes track everything about their game and so on. I think its important for people to track themselves too. I know I'm always searching for the origins of why I feel a certain way or why something is hard or easy for me. One pattern I definitely see in myself is that I'm happiest when I'm tracking nature. But I have a pretty broad definition of nature.
Update
Well I had an excellent road trip through NYC, North Carolina, a bunch of other places, topped off with a hotel stay on Bourbon street in New Orleans before we made it to Austin the next day. Many thanks to my first mate Chris Galis and our excellent gps lady, Bandy.
Next I went to San Diego and met Barry Martin who started the San Diego Tracking Team. I'm hoping to move out there in March and do some work with him. I also took another eval with Jonah Evans as our evaluator. I squeaked out the highest score with a 96. I do a lot better when I'm not attached to the outcome.
Jonah invited me to come out to Big Bend in a couple weeks and take answers for an eval out there. I'm excited for that. They have a bunch of weird animals out there.
For now I've got a moose hide that needs softening, flint that needs knapping and lots of animals that need to be tracked. Here are some pictures from San Diego: Kangaroo rat tracks, big male bobcat tracks and my moose hide.
Next I went to San Diego and met Barry Martin who started the San Diego Tracking Team. I'm hoping to move out there in March and do some work with him. I also took another eval with Jonah Evans as our evaluator. I squeaked out the highest score with a 96. I do a lot better when I'm not attached to the outcome.
Jonah invited me to come out to Big Bend in a couple weeks and take answers for an eval out there. I'm excited for that. They have a bunch of weird animals out there.
For now I've got a moose hide that needs softening, flint that needs knapping and lots of animals that need to be tracked. Here are some pictures from San Diego: Kangaroo rat tracks, big male bobcat tracks and my moose hide.
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